distraught_roach
Fandoms
Recent works
-
Tags
Summary
Pavel is a proud Red soldier, a tribute to his Commander's good teachings, an excellent infiltrator, loyal to a fault, and a ruthless asset. But above all else he is a hopeless, pathetic romantic.
Artyom was given the title of Savior for an act he would do anything to take back, he is risen up on a pedestal for something that is unthinkable. He just likes having someone to listen to, someone who can be his escape.
And Melnik is just really, really tired.
(Collection of various small writings I do, usually only 1-3 scenes, all are vaguely connected through my own headcanons and canon-divergent AU but won't necessarily be in any chronological order. Some may be reused in or spawn larger fics but will remain here to look back on. Most tend to focus on Pavel b/c he is my fucked up wife <3)
-
Please Don't Find Me [I'm Not Okay] by distraught_roach for RadioSilencer
Fandoms: Dream SMP
30 Dec 2022
Tags
Summary
Tommy does not breathe and he does not laugh and he does not swear. Tommy is not the harsh cry of a fledgling eagle soaring over the brisk mountain tops. Tommy is not the wind teasing the tall aspen, Tommy is not the babbling brook in the morning sun. Tommy is not life itself and he is not nothing at once.
Or at least, not anymore.
-------
or: a c!bedrock bros hanahaki soulmate au with plenty of allium duo fluff as well <3 -
Tags
Summary
Technoblade never planned to become a warrior. Techno never planned to develop the voices. Techno never planned to pick up a sword and never put it down. But as the years went on he got used to it and he found out three things about himself. 1) Techno never planned to settle down, to make himself vulnerable . 2) He never planned to find a squealer in the nether, all alone. 3) life is never planned, and sometimes its all you can do to make the most of it.
or: technoblade adopts a baby piglin!tommy bc we said so <3
Series
- Part 1 of 2022 mcyt fic fight- team mushroom
Recent bookmarks
-
Mother Hen by The_Bulletproof_Heart
Fandoms: Transformers: Prime, Transformers - All Media Types
18 Oct 2021
Tags
Summary
Four times Soundwave carried Starscream out of danger and one time Starscream returned the favor.
Series
- Part 4 of Soundscream Week 2021
Bookmarked by distraught_roach
28 Jun 2026
-
The Sum of Its Parts by Owlix
Fandoms: Transformers - All Media Types, The Transformers (IDW Generation One)
30 Mar 2014
Tags
Summary
Prowl deals with the unforeseen complications of having joined with a larger gestalt mind.
Bookmarked by distraught_roach
26 Jun 2026
-
Tags
Summary
For a young sparkling, a creator eating the last of your favorite treat is an offense on par with the greatest crime. So, naturally, Red Alert dials the Enforcers to come arrest his daddy in response. The Enforcer they get turns out to be just what they both needed.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,751
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 440
- Kudos:
- 1,253
- Bookmarks:
- 284
- Hits:
- 16,950
Bookmarked by distraught_roach
26 Jun 2026
-
Things Fallen And Reclaimed by MlleMusketeer
Fandoms: Transformers Animated (2007), Transformers - All Media Types
08 Apr 2021
Tags
Summary
“I’m not sure I can trust you,” said Ultra Magnus, relishing the way Optimus’s faceplate flushed with humiliation. “You’ll have a guard for those two weeks, and you will stay here, in Fortress Maximus, to ensure you don’t try anything creative.” He stepped closer, hating the way Optimus held his ground. “By the way, Optimus—you will succeed in charming Megatron. He was entirely correct when he said the Decepticons have the Allspark. This treaty must succeed.” He leaned forward. “Or I will know exactly at whose stabilizers the blame lies.”
Optimus finds himself betrothed to Megatron, and Megatron a surprisingly courteous suitor. But the Decepticons are afraid of something, a looming threat on the edge of known space...
...and Decepticon machinations may be the least of Optimus's worries.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,614
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Comments:
- 507
- Kudos:
- 2,412
- Bookmarks:
- 452
- Hits:
- 34,567
Bookmarked by distraught_roach
25 Jun 2026
-
face of my lover (your lover on mine) by otooga (olooga)
Fandoms: Transformers - All Media Types, The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers: Prime
16 Dec 2024
Tags
Summary
Jazz and Prowl exchange a strange look, something that makes Megatron want to strangle them because he can’t decipher what it is. He pushes back the suspicion that they’ve caught onto his situation; it would be impossible for them to know. There is nothing different about Prime’s frame or processor from when Ratchet had scanned him during his forced berth rest. They cannot know about him.
“If you need an extended leave, don’t refrain from requesting it,” Prowl says after a small pause. “That was quite a blow to the helm you took.”
“A measly blow to the helm won’t deter me in the slightest,” Megatron snaps before he can think better. When he does think better, he reiterates to a wide-eyed Prowl, “that is, my helm is more than capable of taking a hit.”
Jazz laughs at that. It sounds strained.
“Sure,” he agrees, “yeah, sure. Hey, how many digits am I holding up?”
.
.
.
or; waking up in your arch nemesis' body is definitely high up on the list of Things That Will Royally Fuck Shit Up, right alongside not knowing how it happened, how to get back, and also how said arch nemesis ran their faction full of idiots through four million years of war.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,716
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 139
- Kudos:
- 1,595
- Bookmarks:
- 450
- Hits:
- 12,281
Bookmarked by distraught_roach
25 Jun 2026