LeanMeanSaltineMachine
Fandoms
- Hermitcraft SMP (11)
- Critical Role: Exandria (Web Series) (10)
- RWBY (10)
- Vampires SMP (8)
- The Magnus Archives (Podcast) (5)
Recent works
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The Traveler and the Fae by LeanMeanSaltineMachine for Sparrow1M
Fandoms: Haunted Winter SMP
05 Apr 2026
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Summary
Once there was a man who passed into faery lands. The man had been in a hurry, though if you were to ask the man he would not be able to tell you why. The result is the same, regardless. A trespasser is never looked upon with fondness, humans even less so, and the faery demanded the man provide recompense.
The man, unfamiliar with fae laws, gave his name and was cursed to spend his days as a traveler, only able to settle in one place for 100 days or less.
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A Traveler is drawn back to the Winter Court after being cursed where he must fulfill four tasks and, perhaps, even slay a king.
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now listen to that heart rate by LeanMeanSaltineMachine for drygrasses
Fandoms: Vampires SMP
03 Apr 2026
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Summary
Legundo is peacefully studying in the library when Scott Goldsmith decides to drop-by. How wonderful.
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[podfic] your justly earned reprise by LeanMeanSaltineMachine for TheEnderWolf
Fandoms: Haunted Winter SMP
26 Mar 2026
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Summary
When Legundo Travels to a new world, he's quickly declared a god and assigned two assistants: Drift and Viking. Now Legundo must:
- Solve the issue of Krampus,
- Figure out what Drift and Viking want from him,
- Deal with the local wildlife.
Simple enough, right? …Right.
—
Legundo is called a god, The Traveler, and he's to be treated with all the respect and reverence as deserving of his station.
Legundo might just be sick to his stomach.
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[web weave/collage] sing of the moon by LeanMeanSaltineMachine for starshapedballoon
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP
26 Mar 2026
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Summary
Mumbo and Pearl go stargazing <3
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[podfic] butterflies by LeanMeanSaltineMachine for Vanyel
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
26 Mar 2026
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Summary
Tango breathes in, then out, then hides his face in the crook of Zedaph's neck. Violet eyes lazily blink open in response. “Sumthin’ wrong?” he asks, and Tango feels it when he speaks, his free hand splayed out against the other's chest. Tango frowns as he collects his thoughts.
”I think I have a crush,” he whispers.
It was such a simple sentence, and yet, Tango felt like he had just confessed his darkest secret.
Or; Tango is nervous about telling his partners about his feelings for his soulmate. They take it better than expected.
Recent series
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RWBY Fanfics by emo_space_gay, LeanMeanSaltineMachine, rivercollabs (theriveroflight), Stormage_dark_lord, sureashyr, UnsteadyShade
Fandom RWBY
09 Nov 2025
- Words:
- 2,233
- Works:
- 1
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coaxing the words from the earth and the dirt by LeanMeanSaltineMachine
Fandom Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Stardew Valley (Video Game)
14 Feb 2026
Summary
Cody knows there's something weird going on in Pelican Town, and he's determined to figure out what.
- Words:
- 1,229
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 3
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on the open roads by DuskDragon39, LeanMeanSaltineMachine
Fandom The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
02 Sep 2023
- Words:
- 20,155
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 1
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- Words:
- 6,046
- Works:
- 3
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- Words:
- 4,345
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 5
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
Dr. Ryland Grace, destitute, just wants a job. There are certainly worse possibilities than becoming a live-in tutor.
Eva Stratt, newly guardian of five nieces and nephews, wants a highly educated, responsible, capable governess, who will meet all of the children's needs and also who won't run away from the household (again). Someone should not be this hard to find.
Franzi would like to draw a picture. Rosi would like to read a book. Erich would like to learn more about stars, please. Elma would like everyone to be happy. Gunther would really, really, really, thank you very much, like to have a dog.
Sound of Music AU.
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Summary
Grace and Carl have been spending a lot of time together lately.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,530
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 12
- Kudos:
- 225
- Bookmarks:
- 31
- Hits:
- 1,640
Bookmarked by LeanMeanSaltineMachine
27 Jun 2026
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God of Something by Crows_whatcoffee
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
19 Jun 2026
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Summary
”Means holy, like something special. To be worshipped.” They explain.
Oh.
Oh shoot, wait.
-_—_
Something to be worshipped.
I scoff at myself, gathering my stuff and heading up to my house.
Imagine.
Bookmarked by LeanMeanSaltineMachine
27 Jun 2026
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Summary
From: Jeff K
To: Ryland Grace
Date: February 7th, 2017
(no subject)
Dr. grace did you actualy get kidnapped by the FBI or is kevin lying? he told me that you went into a black car and nobody has seen you since then :(—
A collection of emails between Dr. Ryland Grace and the staff and students of Grover Cleveland Middle School during his time on the Petrova Line Task Force.
Bookmarked by LeanMeanSaltineMachine
27 Jun 2026
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A Comprehensive Guide to the Care and Keeping of Humans by ifonlyiwaswittier
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
Life has a funny way of giving Grace everything he's ever wanted.
(Or, in which Grace adjusts to his new life on Erid. Rocky, as always, just wants to help.)
Bookmarked by LeanMeanSaltineMachine
26 Jun 2026