Work Text:
How had DA4901 managed to get his childhood friend to persuade him to dress up as that very character and go around handing out presents?
All his friend had to do was see the flu virus in action, wearing a strange red suit and a weird pointy hat, carrying a bag full of strange gifts - but actually death traps for cells - to come up with the most absurd idea ever.
«What if we all dressed up like this at Christmas to make our deliveries?»
Come to think of it, "Christmas Day" would have been a day like any other, so they would not even have had time to stop and "celebrate" it - in the words of the body in which they worked. DA4901 had heard about this special celebration in his brain: a few days earlier, when he had made a delivery there, the Commander had talked about how the body was preparing for this special day on which it would exchange small gifts with its fellow beings, in peace and harmony. From the Commander's words, it seemed that these gifts were different from those brought by the flu virus: they were not surprises that brought chaos, but rather simple and beautiful objects that would be treasured by those who received them.
And it was from that moment that his childhood friend, his hair pulled back in a long tail, had begun to insist that they dress up as "Santa Claus": this was the name of the figure that SS1104 exclaimed enthusiastically with each passing day.
«I can't wait for Santa-san to come!»
«I heard that Santa-san gives good presents to those who behave well... and I've behaved well, haven't I?»
«01-kun, don't be so angry or Santa-san won't bring you what you want!»
Enough with this "Santa-san": even you know very well that he doesn't exist! - DA4901 wanted to reply to his childhood friend.
But he could not, because in his eyes he saw the same enthusiasm as in other cells he knew well and with which he had to deal every day.
«Forget it.»
DA4901 frowned at a young man with eyes that stood out from his square frame and brown hair with a rebellious tuft standing out from the rest. His colleague, AA2153, had a thick false beard, a red hat on his head with a small white pompom that fell to his shoulders, and in his hands he held an oxygen box that was different from the usual: instead of the usual white with blue details, it had changed to a bright red with golden yellow undertones, and on one of the sides of the box was a large label with the words "Christmas edition. Happy Holidays!"
«I'm not wearing this stuff, period» the raven-haired young man said, snorting deeply. «We look like clowns!»
«Come on, don't you want to be Santa-san for a day?»
The other handed him the box with a big smile, but DA4901 turned his back on him, arms crossed. «Sorry, but no: we're just red blood cells, what's the point of celebrating something like that? We're working... even more today than before: you'll see the amount of food this body will take in!»
«Don't tell me you'd rather be the Grinch…»
«The… what?»
«The Grinch! Don't you know him? In my body, where I came from, some information about that character came to my brain after watching a film: he's a grumpy, irascible and very lonely character... you remind me a lot of him right now!»
«Do I look like the kind of person who would go for this nonsense? Of course I don't know him... in fact, I bet none of us have ever heard of him.»
DA4901 returned to look at his companion. AA2153 had not moved an inch, waiting for him to take the box he handed him.
«So what are you going to do?» he asked him. «Are you going to go back to work, or are you going to stand here all day and watch me hold this box?»
The raven-haired young man looked him up and down and, after a moment's silence, decided to pick up the box. «I'm going back to work, but without you. SS1104 will have convinced everyone of this nonsense... but he won't convince me. Where is this delivery going?»
AA2153 put the delivery note in his pocket. «Left lung. The exact address is written on the receipt, and if you have any doubts you can look at the map.»
«I know, I know: I'm not clueless…» DA4901 said, turning away from his companion after saying goodbye.
«Sooo… the Grinch, huh?»
DA4901 gasped as he turned the corner of the street where he had parted company with AA2153, almost dropping the box he was carrying. Suddenly he found himself face to face with SS1104, also wearing the same accessories as the brown-haired young man, the only difference being their everyday work uniforms.
«I'll have to do some thorough research, he seems like a very interesting character! Our comrade is right, he reminds me so much of someone…» said the amused friend, handing him a thick white beard and a hat like the one on his head. «Come on, I promise you'll have fun too!»
DA4901 was unmoved. «No.»
«Come on, please!»
«I said no.»
«But what do you care about it? I assure you, you'll be prettier this way, the cells will appreciate it!»
«What don't you understand about the word “no”, 04-kun? Or do I have to draw a picture of it?»
«Ugh... you're always the same. Fine: I never wanted to do it, but…»
DA4901's eyes were filled with curiosity as he saw his friend put the fake beard and hat on the floor, open his belt pouch and take out his mobile phone. Trying to hold back his laughter, SS1104 continued: «What if I told you that this disguise might impress someone you know?»
«First of all, ours is not a real disguise because we only have a beard and a hat. Secondly, our superiors might like it too, but my answer is still no. Now, if you don't mind, I have a delivery to make: see you later.»
DA4901 continued on his way, passing his companion, but stopped when he overheard the following statement, made with amusement behind him: «Not even a certain pink-tailed white blood cell? And in case you're wondering, yes, I have proof!»
The young raven-haired red blood cell turned his head slowly, not hiding his astonishment. «What... what did you say, now?»
SS1104 burst out laughing. «Now you care, huh? I knew it... come here, I'll show you something.»
«I do care because who knows what mischief you've been up to, knowing you!» DA4901 put the box down and returned to his companion, looking at him sideways. «So?»
«Well, it's a simple matter: I bumped into her and her friends while making a delivery, and after accidentally saying hello to them, my ears heard that they were having a nice little talk about Santa-san; so, unnoticed, I hid and eavesdropped on the whole thing... I even made a video, because I know you would have liked to see it!»
«W-What did you do?!»
DA4901's face turned crimson. He looked at his friend with wide eyes, embarrassment rising to the top of his hair. «They... didn't notice anything, did they?»
«Absolutely not, otherwise I wouldn't be here talking to you! It's a risk I was happy to take... all for you, my friend!»
SS1104 hit the play button on his phone. Although the zoom used had degraded the quality of the footage, the image of the girl with the pink tails, J-1178, sitting on a bench with her friends not far away, was very clear in the video. The video was short, and you couldn't hear everything because of the confusion caused by the hustle and bustle of the working cells, but DA4901 managed to catch a clear phrase in the speech that came from J-1178's lips:
«I wish Santa-san would come to me on the night of the 24th with a good present: I know he doesn't exist, but it would be nice!»
At the end of the video, the raven-haired boy took a deep breath and said: «A very useful video... but now you have to delete it.»
His friend's answer was flat: «No.»
«Delete it. Right now.»
«I said no, I won't.»
DA4901 was about to lose his patience. «I'm telling you again: delete the damn video.»
«Um…» At that moment, SS1104 seemed to be on the verge of agreeing to his request: he put a hand under his chin in an act of reflection, and only after a moment of silence returned to speak. «All right, I'll do it... but on one condition.»
«Let's hear it.»
«You have to dress up as Santa-san and bring her a nice present!" His friend opened the fanny pack again and this time took out a complete Santa suit. "I happen to have this costume with me: you'd be perfect!»
The other burst out. «I'm not even thinking about it! Do you want to embarrass me in front of her?»
«Wow... I had no idea you were going to say “to her”, I thought you didn't want to do that for everyone!»
«Of course it applies to the rest of the body too, but I don't want her to see me as an idiot!»
«You won't be an idiot, because you will be Santa-san! The original, not just a red blood cell with a pointy hat and a beard!»
«In any case, the answer is no! You can keep the video, you can't show it to the people concerned anyway, otherwise you'd be the one in trouble, goodbye!» DA4901 picked up the box he had left on the floor and walked away from his friend, muttering, «Screw Christmas and this Santa-san... what does it change for us red blood cells? I don't understand…»
«What did you say?» asked SS1104, his back to him at that moment. «Could you repeat it, please? I didn't hear you very well.»
«I said that this holiday is just nonsense, and that this idea of dressing up as Santa-san is nonsense too!» DA4901 shouted out, without turning around. «I hope that's clear now, see you later…»
The young man took a few more steps, but froze when he heard some recorded phrases coming from his friend's mobile phone. He hoped in his heart that he had been mistaken, that his ears had betrayed him; unfortunately, his suspicions were confirmed when he looked back at his friend, who was now watching the mobile phone from which DA4901 could hear the last sentence he had just spoken over and over again.
«I said that this holiday is just nonsense, and that this idea of dressing up as Santa-san is nonsense too!»
DA4901 started to break out in a cold sweat, and began to understand why his friend had filmed him at that very moment. If that video had fallen into the wrong hands... into the hands of that white blood cell, he...
«You know she'll be heartbroken when she hears those words... from you?» said SS1104, not hiding his satisfaction at what he had just done. «You can well imagine what might happen... do you want to check it out with me? While I'm at it, I might as well start planning your funeral…»
Within seconds, the raven-haired red blood cell had closed the distance between himself and his friend. «You'll never have the guts to show it,» he muttered indignatly, «or you'll end up in little pieces too: forget about my funeral, we'll both risk our lives!»
«Do you think so?» SS1104 shrugged, undeterred by what he had been told. «You know me well enough, so you already know I'll do it anyway.»
«Don't you dare do that, or else…»
«Or else what? I'll just show you the truth of the facts, which is that you don't like this holiday. Honesty comes first for you, so what does it change for you that she knows it this way?»
«Nothing, but…» DA4901 lowered his eyes, mortified, «but yours is a cheap shot. I'm just telling you it's not fair…»
«Then put on that Santa-san costume and go to her!»
«I already told you: forget it.»
«You don't have much of a choice, 01-kun: either you tell her dressed as Santa-san, or I tell her with this video. So what have you decided? I swear I'll delete the video as soon as I'm sure you're with her, man's word!»
DA4901 looked at the costume that SS1104 was still holding, then picked it up, along with the beard and hat that were left on the floor.
«I'm just saying, you're blackmailing me, and that's not fair.»
And here we go back to where the story started.
How had DA4901 been persuaded by his childhood friend to put on that ridiculous Santa Claus costume and walk around the body handing out presents?
The answer, humiliating as it was, was simple: blackmail. And all day long, the young red blood cell had done nothing but feel uncomfortable in the shoes of a legendary figure that did not belong to him; fortunately, no one had recognised him yet, but the embarrassment grew with every step he took, like a constant presence that oppressed him more and more as he walked through the blood vessels.
Worst of all, everyone was staring at him: some with eyes full of astonishment, others with a curiosity that only increased his feeling of being in a nightmare from which he could not escape.
At that moment, DA4901 just wanted to vanish into thin air, perhaps into the spleen, where no one would ever find him again. At one point, he even seemed to hear the thoughts of the cells he encountered, all of them amazed or confused, each with their own reaction to his unusual appearance.
At times, one of them seemed on the verge of stopping him, perhaps to ask him a question or simply to satisfy the curiosity pulsing through his veins, but DA4901, with the discipline typical of red blood cells, continued to pretend that he had seen nothing, that everything was normal: he drove straight on, towards his destination, hoping to complete his task without further interruption.
But what exactly was his destination?
He couldn't even remember, his mind was so clouded with shame. The very thought of walking through the blood vessels dressed like a second-hand Santa Claus, without even a sleigh or reindeer to lend him the slightest bit of dignity, drove him mad.
When he finally entered a narrow, lightly trafficked capillary, he felt a small relief. He paused for a moment to catch his breath and felt his heartbeat finally slow down. He grabbed the receipt for his next delivery, quickly unfolded it, and as soon as he read the words 'bone marrow', his eyes widened in surprise and panic.
Bone marrow? The birthplace of red and white blood cells?
Oh, perfect. Sarcastically, he told himself that he was off to a great start that day and immediately put the paper back in his pocket. If anyone finds out it's me, my identity will be the joke of the whole body for generations!
Another deep breath.
Another attempt to remain calm.
He stepped out of the capillary and, as if this hadn't already been one of his worst days, walked quickly, his face hidden by the white beard that contrasted strangely with his red costume, as did the colour of his embarrassment.
Bone marrow... help, he thought, a shiver running down his spine. I have a really bad feeling about this...
DA4901 continued to walk through the bloodstream, trying to maintain some balance, but the weight of shame over the costume almost crushed him. Each step seemed harder than the last and his mind was a whirlwind of confused and embarrassing thoughts. He only wished that it would all end quickly, that someone would tell him that the day had been a collective mistake, and that his Santa-san costume would magically disappear.
Unfortunately, fate had other surprises in store for him.
A small group of cells, too lively to go unnoticed, appeared on the horizon. Erythroblasts and myelocytes, small and fast, approached in the blink of an eye, and DA4901 didn't even have time to notice them that he could already hear their light voices.
«Santa-san! Santa-san!» they shouted in unison, their eyes full of excitement and their voices sounding almost too loud for his poor mind. «Happy to see you!»
DA4901 didn't even have time to take a step back before the group completely surrounded him. He stopped suddenly and raised his hands in a sign of peace, trying to keep control.
«H-hi kids, what's going on?» He tried to keep a neutral tone, but his voice betrayed the obvious effort to sound calm.
The little cells, unaware of “Santa-san”s' true identity, were bouncing around him, eyes wide with excitement, an enthusiasm that almost hurt. They were overjoyed to meet a figure who, in their eyes, was nothing less than legendary.
«Santa-san! Did you bring us presents?» one of them asked, his face beaming with curiosity. «We've been so good this year, haven't we?»
Another erythroblast, a little more robust than the others, stepped forward with an even more anxious question. «Yes, yes! Where are the presents? The macrophage teacher told us! You bring the presents!»
DA4901 felt sweat running down his back. He tried to keep a smile on his face, but it was obviously forced. «Well… actually…»
But, as could easily be predicted, the small cells weren't even listening. One myelocyte, the smallest of them all, jumped onto one of his shoulders, eager to find out what he had in the bag. «Come on, show, show!»
The young erythrocyte tried to remain calm, but by now the excitement was growing inside him. The small group had now completely surrounded him, and his eyes were searching desperately for an escape route: he had to get out of this situation and make his next delivery as soon as possible.
«Well, look, um... I have more presents to deliver, yes!» he stammered, as if he had just had a brilliant idea. «Right, yes! More presents on the way, can't stop and chat for too long!» He tried to take a step forward, but the group followed him as one, with no intention of letting him go.
«But what kind of presents?» one asked, and immediately another added: «Strange presents, like the ones we saw last time?»
DA4901 gritted his teeth. Strange presents? Last time? What had they seen last time? Another walking disaster in the form of gift distribution?
There was no more time to think: he had to escape before the situation became even more ridiculous.
«Ah, I can't say anything!» he continued to improvise, trying to sound more mysterious and authoritative than he actually felt. «It's a surprise! I'll deliver the presents later, but I have to go now, otherwise…» He paused, pausing dramatically as the group paused for a moment, confused by his statement, «otherwise, I will miss the train!»
The silence that followed seemed to hang in the air. Then, one of the erythroblasts, with the air of someone who had understood nothing, looked at him with wide eyes and shouted: «Train? Where to? Can I come too?!»
Another added, confused: «But since when does Santa-san travel by train? What happened to the reindeer sleigh? Did it break down?»
DA4901 was about to explode. I don't know, I don't know... enough!
He could not hold back another sigh. He had to think of something, otherwise he would be trapped in that crowd of excited little cells for the rest of the day.
Finally arriving at the “delivery point”, he approached the red blood cell, which looked at him with a confused expression and handed him the package, without even wondering if he was really the addressee.
Who cares if it's him or not: I won't stay here another second!
Behind him, the erythroblasts were silent for a moment, confused, but soon they were jumping and shouting again as if nothing had happened.
«But Santa-san hasn't brought us any presents yet!» one of them complained, while another exclaimed more optimistically: «Never mind, it'll be a surprise!»
DA4901 did not even stop to look back. He could still hear their chatter behind him, but he hurried along the blood vessels, hoping to reach his next destination before anyone else noticed his disguise.
If it hadn't been for 04-kun's threat, I would have told all my workmates to go to hell for this truly absurd idea!
DA4901 continued his run, but each step he took seemed to burden him with a growing unease. He had already passed a number of tight bends and was now in an area of the bloodstream he had not visited for some time. The cells that crossed his path watched him with curiosity, but despite his efforts to maintain an impassive air, his mind could not shake the overwhelming feeling of being out of place. Santa-san's costume, with its ridiculous combination of white beard and red jacket, only added to his strangeness. Every move he made seemed more awkward, every step he took more wrong.
Suddenly he stopped in front of a group of white blood cells that patrolled the area, alert and ready to intervene in case of infection.
DA4901's heart began to beat faster. He was not so much afraid of being recognised - with the embarrassment that would entail - as he was of being mistaken for some kind of bacterium and taken out in an instant.
Maybe I should take off this costume... but what if that 04-kun fool finds out?
He looked around, scanning the area for a way out. Then, with a sigh, he decided to take a quick step and try to sneak away. But just as he was about to slip away, one of the white blood cells stopped him.
«Hey, you!» a hoarse, authoritative voice said.
DA4901 tensed. Well, this is the end of me. He turned around, trying to appear indifferent, but he knew it was too late.
The white blood cell was watching him with a look that changed from disbelief to genuine curiosity. «Are you... are you really Santa-san?» she asked, as if it were an almost unbelievable question. «Gosh, it's been a long time since we've met, I'm glad you survived everything this body has endured!»
DA4901 couldn't help but feel an inexplicable sense of relief. He had not been recognised as Santa-san's replacement, but as the original.
The pressure eased, though a slight feeling of embarrassment remained: he tried to remain calm, but his breath came out a little faster than usual.
«Yes, I... I am Santa-san,» he said, trying to give his voice the solemnity it should have had, but which, to him at least, sounded a little strange. «As you well know, I have deliveries today... well, special deliveries for each of you.»
The white blood cell looked at him for a long moment, then took a step back with a deep breath and looked at him with a smile she couldn't hold back. «Well, if there's a gift for me too, even though I'm no longer a myelocyte... ha ha, but what am I saying! I know very well: Santa-san only comes for the younger cells, I'm quite mature now! But it's okay, it's okay: you can pass... and mind you, bring a lot of joy and happiness to the future generations!»
That answer made him feel strangely relieved: he had not been mistaken for an impostor, but for the real Santa-san.
Maybe... maybe it works...
After saying goodbye to her, DA4901 continued on his way, reflecting on how the day was taking an increasingly strange turn... but at the same time calmer than the first moments.
But he had no time to take two more steps before he froze again, this time his heart stopping for a moment. There in the middle of the street, in front of him, was J-1178: the girl with the pink pigtails he had been trying to forget all day. She was sitting on a bench, as if waiting for someone, and when their eyes met, DA4901 felt a knot in his throat.
Shit! She recognised me!
J-1178 looked at him with that childish curiosity that DA4901 had tried so hard to avoid. And at that moment, something snapped in the young red blood cell's heart that he could no longer ignore.
SS1104's thread, the video, the shame... it all seemed to burst inside him. The temptation to look away and flee was strong, but there was something that held him back, something he could no longer deny, something that revealed itself in a hidden corner of his heart: sincerity.
His childhood friend had been right: for him, honesty came before everything else, and he could no longer ignore it. So he sighed, adjusted his hat, trimmed his beard and approached J-1178. «H-Hi» he stammered, his voice shaking. «I-I'm glad to see you here. Well…»
But he didn't have time to finish the sentence: the girl's face lit up, and a sincere smile appeared on her lips. «Santa-san!» she exclaimed. «Is it really you? I've been waiting for you, I knew you would come!»
DA4901 hesitated, but then nodded with a smile he could not suppress. «Yes, it is indeed me. And I have a gift for you.»
At that moment, as he prepared to hand her the small gift, the red blood cell understood something important: sometimes, the real gift was not so much the form in which it was given, but the meaning behind it.
And he also understood that the truth could wait. At least for that moment.
―
Bonus.
A little further away, in a discreet corner of the street, a young red blood cell was filming the whole scene with amusement, a giggle occasionally escaping his lips.
«How good are you as Santa-san, 01-kun! See, 76-kun? I told you, you should learn from him, especially today, when you go for the kidneys!»
His strong workmate, standing nearby, looked at him with a puzzled expression. «One thing I don't understand... why are you filming him? There's no need to blackmail him anymore, is there?»
«Trust me...» SS1104 replied, almost whispering as if he were revealing a secret. «Trust me, he'll love seeing himself in that hilarious scene once I've worked some magic in post-production. It'll be my Christmas present... or rather, it'll be the present of a Santa-san with long white hair and no beard!»